ELEMENT: Woman
SYMBOL: wo
DISCOVERER: Adam
ATOMIC MASS: Accepted at 53.6 kg but known to vary from 40-200 kg
OCCURRENCES: Copious specimens in all populated areas
PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:
1. Surface usually covered by a painted film
2. Boils at nothing; freezes without known reason
3. Melts if given special treatment
4. Bitter if incorrectly used
5. Found in various states from virgin metal to common ore
6. Yields if pressure applied in correct places
CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:
1. Has great affinity for gold, silver and a range of precious stones
2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances
3. May explode spontaneously without prior warning or apparent reason
4. Insoluble in liquids, but activity increases greatly when saturated
with alcohol
5. Most powerful money-reducing agent known to man
COMMON USES:
1. Highly ornamental
2. Can be great aid to relaxation
3. Civilizing effect on bachelor environments
4. Distribution of wealth
TESTS:
1. Unadorned specimen turns rosy pink when discovered in natural state
2. Turns green when placed beside a better specimen
HAZARDS:
1. Highly dangerous except in experienced hands
2. Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be maintained
at different locations as long as specimens do not come into direct contact
with each other.