I have something I would like to get off my chest. I don't know where to begin, but here goes.
YES, I did leave ZG last night to join MC.
Let me eplain why:
As you all might've noticed, I am no longer a defender or a guardian in the guild. This is because at rg1 and rg2 raidnights I am busy with RL stuff.
Things I can't change, some of them I don't want to change. That is why I haven't applied for any raiding status.
But what happened last night was that the RL things were cancelled.
And I thought I could help in ZG.
But then the guild went to MC, and I took a selfish descission. I thought "Hey, now's my chance to finally try for the leaf (for the hunterq). I don't get that too often, since I am busy raidnights."
I talked to the raid leaders about it.
What I did not know, was that I was asking to leave right before a boss. OK, I admit it. I am a n00b in instances.
And what I also didn't know, was that there were alot of others who wanted to go too.
It is claimed that I was asked to stay. I can't recall that. But maybe I was? Maybe I was to selfish that I just did not see? Maybe it was w to some other person instead? What do I know?
One thing is certain: I would NEVER leave a raid if I knew I left right before a boss, or that I was asked to stay, or if I hadn't been told "go if you want".
Obviously, I made alot of trouble last night and for that I am sincerely sorry.
Guild kick me, yell at me, hate me, suspend me from all raids, do whatever you like. It was wrong and I know it.
But please don't put me on ignore when I try to apologise and to work things out.
If people are busy, I understand the words: I am busy, it's a bad time.
It is childish, in my opinion, to ignore people when they try to explain.
Maybe it is for alot of other reasons? I don't know, and I don't care if I am kept in that list.
At least now I have gotten what I wanted to say out off my chest, and that's all that matters. I'm not defending my actions, I'm not here to put blaim on people, I just wanted to explain.
If I only knew, maybe things have been different.
Again, I am deeply sorry for what happened, and I apologise to everyone, the guild, the raid, and the RL's.
- Theoline -
I was there, i didnt see this episode and it wasnt a problem for me, so no problemo from my side
i dont see the problem here either,
its a game, you do what you like most, or sometimes you do something less fun to do something really fun
and flaming people is not something that is fun to do specialy for the recieving end
i would probably have done the same in her position, so i would stand by her decision
so how about we all back off drop it go back to our GAME
To be quite honest, in my eyes, there are two problems here:
the decision to leave the ZG raid, and the reaction to it.
What I would say about the raid, is that people should look at it as a pug - if we decide to leave any other pug, it leaves a bitter taste in the mouth, but its not against the rules. Respect is a two way thing, you build it up over time, and with it you earn leeway. Ellie, I felt, has earned enough leeway and is an experienced enough player to judge what she wants to do. (Ok, maybe inexperienced in ZG, but its not her fault that the raid leaders didn't bother to inform her a boss was coming up, or that leaving might spark a chain of it, or for that matter explaining themselves clearly enough).
The second problem is the real one: the immature and childish reaction of a Marshall (of all people!) to an attempt to fix the problem. Let me ask you, how the hell do you plan on discussing the issue, never mind correcting it but putting Ellie on ignore? What does that achieve? Its ultimately self defeating.
(History analogy: a Marshall/officer ignoring a guild member with a problem, is like a general in a battle ignoring the complaints of his soldiers).
I'll tell you what, and I feel strongly about this: in my eyes Ellie might well made a selfish decision (can't blame her myself), but the reaction of the marshall is preposterous - and I openly, and publicly, question his ability to lead in the face of problems.
agree fully with lucian here
nicely said
I was in last night ZG run and I did not see or hear this before now.
But I am sad to see the way you have being treated Elenionet and you descission about leaving ZG for going to MC I don't see anything wrong with.
Something must have been really nasty to get ele upset, she has always been polite and always ALWAYS asks peopel before she does anything, nevermind leaving a raid, so from my experience no way would she have left without first being sure it was ok.
In pretty much all things, ignoring someone is something that is done when ine party does not listen to reason and usually when that party is in the wrong, if you cut the lines of communication when that is all we have to solve a dispute you may as well stick a flag over your head saying 'i was wrong but i'm not going to admit it'.
I may have a personal bias here becasue Ele has always had time to chat and be nice to me and doesn't seem capable of purposefully annoying someone. tbh we need more peopel like this in the guild so please don't alienate them with petty complaints. With ele on TS you can hear the smile, don;t make that go away or i'll be upset. an upset Umbra is not something you want :P
on a more generic note, this harks back to communication from RL, if you want to make your point known, make it obvious and clear what you want. If you've ever heard me on TS, you'll know that when necessary i speak clearly and concisely in order to make my point known.
remember, communication is all we have, if you block that, or use it incorrectly, don't get mad at an outcome you weren't expecting
over and out
Lucian and Umbra pretty much said it all!
Only one small thing to add: gib more female druids, don't try to scare away the few ones we've got :smile:
WTB Honorary Guardian rank for Elenionet! :P
It's all been said. GL on the leaf next time.
Have no clue of what is mentioned here? Yes ofc it was kinda selfish decision to leave for MC instead of staying at ZG. However i was there and didnt see anyone flaming him or saying he/she could not go??? So cant really comment on this since i dont know what the fuss is about :D
doing something for yourself isn't such a bad thing, it's what most of us do, however selfish is when you do something for yourself to the detriment of others, to this end She asked the RL if it would be ok, to ensure it would not cause problems to anyone, having received a positive response it is fair to assume it would NOT affect anyone negatively and thus isn't actually selfish.
secondly, as is the nature of such upsetting complaints it would seem these came in whispers, since the parties involved did not want others to know they were throwing the toys out of the pram
Quote from: Umbra;153082secondly, as is the nature of such upsetting complaints it would seem these came in whispers, since the parties involved did not want others to know they were throwing the toys out of the pram
That's a little over-simplified there Umbra. Ignoring this topic's issue and making merely a general point, it is highly doubtful that encouraging people to criticise openly would provide more effective results than a person to person discussion in the long term.
We are both describing the same thing, the only difference is that I did not use your rose-tinted spectacles when typing this. Same thing, different perspective.
TL.
Granted, what I seem to do is start of explaining something, then if someone gets confused I may repost making it simpler each time, that way I can attempt to cater to all levels of comprehension ;)
as with 99% of my posts the disclaimer is that it is purely my opinion, and I will never state this as being fact that holds true in all circumstances.
I bow to your superior social skills (I'm actually being sincere, please don't apply my usual sarcastic tones to this)