Monday: Woke up in my god awful crappy trailer to the sounds of the Bitch whining about what I had to do today?
1. Collect my pay-cheque from the PC Game Deveoper I work for.
2. Pay it into the bank
3. Buy the Bitch a carton of milk.
Easy enough, and all day to do it.
Found something called a Crack Pipe in the street. Tried a smoke.
8O 8O 8O 8O Christ but I feel weird, like Superman, like some kind of God. Feel like I can do anything man...to anybody. Crazy :twisted:
Got to work and there was a demonstration outside being held by a load of anti PC Game loony's. Ignored them and went to the Bosses office. Got paid and then the bastard said I was sacked. Me sacked :!: No way. Started beating on him, harder and harder. Whimp began begging and pleading for me to stop. No way. I was still feeling like a Lion, like a wild warrior and nothing was gonna stop me raining on this bastard :!: .
After a bit the scumbag passed out so I unzipped and emptied my bladder all over his unconcious body. We'll see who's bloody sacked now.
Started to leave and the Anti-PC Game protestors only went and stormed the building armed to the bleedin' teeth. I saw at least two colleagues go down in a hail of bullets. So I hid in the bogs until I heard the sound of Police sirens. Thank Christ. Then I remembered the bitch slapped body of my boss lieing in his office :?: It would be bad if they found him with me in his private toilet high as a kite on crack. Maybe best to slip out the back.
Sneaking through the basement and what did I find :?: Another bloody protestor armed with a sodding machine gun 8O So I grabbed a shovel that was lieing on the floor and snuck up behind her. One swipe and her head was off :evil: It's wierd how long a body keeps twitching without a head. And the blood :!: . You'd never believe how much of it comes out the neck stump. Now I really did need to get out of there.
So through the basement and down an alley. Once in the street I strolled passed the small army of cops outside and headed of to the bank. Christ and it was only 11am :!: And boy do I fancy another one of those crack pipes. No I meant I really really need one.....NOW 8O
http://www.gopostal.com/ (http://www.gopostal.com/)
bad day at work to be sure :scatter:
Hmm, that game could be very very amusing... :D
Anyone got the number for crimestoppers......
I managed to find TWO pipes in a burnt-out building. Smoked one straight away and saved the other for later. Feeling sweeeeeeeet.
Walked back to the Grocer for the milk. Pretty uneventful actually, except for watching some poor schmuck getting mauled by a dog :D Wait a minute, that's MY dog. Pretended I didn't know it, even when it ran up to me barking and wagging it's tail. The guy that it attacked ran off screaming, leaking blood all over the place.
A moment later a cop ran up and shot the dog 8O Still it'll save a fortune on dog food :)
Popped into the grocer for the Bitches milk. It really really stinks of rancid goat in here, no I mean really stinks :!: Grabbed the milk and discovered the source of the goat smell......the meat counter :!: I put two and two together pretty quick and decided to leave pronto. A guy next to me also worked out the meats origin too. Seems he's eaten some in the past as he promply puked his ring all over the floor .....not nice :(
Had to queue for ages but finally got out of the stink pit (I'll shop at the Mall from now on) and checked my map for the bank. Nearly got wasted collecting this damn cheque so I suppose I'd better cash it.
A couple of thugs were having a grand old time kicking the crap out of my ex dog. Each to their own I suppose although it's kind of worrying that they both appeared to be cops :!:
I feel kinda sick and shakey again, maybe I'll smoke that last pipe. Just to get me through the last part of the day.
Dear god man - have you lost your mind :!:
Next thing you'll be going down to Whitechapel "to clean the streets" (gulp) :twisted:
I'm not going back in the office till you say you're normal again.....
Quote I feel kinda sick and shakey again, maybe I'll smoke that last pipe.
...........fetches Cardy and slippers for Smilo :lol:
Err not that kind of pipe :?
hehe, I just got the demo and that game rocks :) damn the 7 minute timeout :?
Only actually bought the milk once however :D
rest fo the time spent shotgunning people to death. I once jammed the shotgun up a cat and was firing through it :roll: insanity!
To disable the time limit on the demo:
Pull down the console and type; set gamestate demotime 9999
Enjoy :)
wicked, now I just gotta remember not to finish the buy milk mission :roll:
found the molotov, but still no sign of the catnip, hunting rifle or grenades :D
The mad Taliban Fanatics have the grenades, but don't pour lighted petrol on them as it sets the grenades off and kills you too...bummer :(
Guess I'll have to be "Agent SteaKnife" and dob you all in to the Met :lol:
hehe, I got a dog to attack people :) it took out an atf cop for some reason or other I'm not quite sure of :D
Just to get this straight, is this game worth 'acquiring' ?? I'm not after play for 30 mins see some nice stuff and then delete it, i want substance here.
Your tag "moaning minnie" is appropriate I see JB - we all know you'll just get it for free :wink: Whats an hours download between forum users :wink:
QuoteJust to get this straight, is this game worth 'acquiring' ?? I'm not after play for 30 mins see some nice stuff and then delete it, i want substance here.
There is no substance ......only evil.
I dunno, but the demo is worth the download, especially with that there time extension thing, although I dont think there are limitless people to kill. I filled the level with corpses. I did find the hunting rifle and the catnip (if you eat it you can see the death sequences in slow-mo :D ) but still no grenades, although I thoroughly killed all the jihad people in the store backrooms. In fact I think I killed everyone on the whole level, then went and got the milk. I think I'm gonna have to get a hold of the real game if its any good? :turn-l:
I wouldn't go as far as to spend my hard earned (lol) cash, but its definatly worth aquiring!
Its a great game when your fed up with all the bullsh*t complicated over-the-top plot lines in other games (your name is captain bongo you have come down from the planet mars to set all the pringle tubes free blah blah whatever..) and you just need to shoot someone (or burn them, or decapitate them with a shovel, or throw scissors at them) :D
Sick, wrong, but strangely fun..
Yeah it's not a game like others. You kind of dip in and out of it when you fancy. Playing through the "errands/quests" is only part of the experience. Just wandering about discovering stuff is where the game really wins.
Such weird stuff happens every time you play.
I was watching the marching band practice when a Taliban bloke ran into the middle of them and blew himself up with a napalm bomb. That resulted in a dozen band members rushing about on fire screaming 8O
Then one ran smack into a dog that burst into flames. The dog in turn ignited and rushed howling into me :!: And then I went up in a ball of flames myself 8O
Rushing about heameraging (sp) health all over the place, until it occured to me to whip down my flies and piss all over myself. Put the fire out in no time :D
Now I'm racking my brains to think of another game that lets you do that :?: :?: :?: