Dead Men Walking

dMw Chit Chat => The Beer Bar => It's my Birthday! => Topic started by: Benny on January 06, 2010, 11:51:35 AM

Title: It snow joke
Post by: Benny on January 06, 2010, 11:51:35 AM
C'mon, let's have your stories, they don't count unless they have a report in. It snowed all night, we're stuck in and will be for a while. It's not the first time my missus has woken up to 8 inches.

Up tot he sills on the car and still going.....can't wait for it to freeze. :g:
Title: It snow joke
Post by: RizZy on January 06, 2010, 12:03:50 PM
It's snowed pretty well in the midlands, unfortunatly not enough to stop me getting to work though.
Title: It snow joke
Post by: Benny on January 06, 2010, 12:07:58 PM
C'mon Riz, no puns, no double entendres? Where's your snowed in spirit? My choice of drink today is Advocaat and lemonade...
Title: It snow joke
Post by: Penfold on January 06, 2010, 12:58:22 PM
Bored with the snow now.

We're were snowed in for three days before Christmas and we're snowed in again today.

And even when we can get out muppets keep blocking the roads with abandoned cars which means the farmer get can't up them with his snowplough :doh:.

This greeted us this morning

(http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h284/mpppen/IMG_8619-1.jpg)

Ever-so-clever muppets blocking way

(http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h284/mpppen/IMG_8468.jpg)
Title: It snow joke
Post by: BrotherTobious on January 06, 2010, 01:01:26 PM
So whos around at home not working and would like to say play a game or 2?....
Title: It snow joke
Post by: sheepy on January 06, 2010, 01:09:01 PM
well ive decided to drive in to the shops as im hoping that most people will be staying at home!
Title: It snow joke
Post by: Gandalf on January 06, 2010, 01:31:16 PM
Quote from: sheepy;300899well ive decided to drive in to the shops as im hoping that most people will be staying at home!

Literally....
:roflmao:

(http://www.deadmen.co.uk/forum/attachment.php?attachmentid=423&d=1262784626)
Title: It snow joke
Post by: Benny on January 06, 2010, 01:46:18 PM
(http://i776.photobucket.com/albums/yy50/Benninio/Jan%2009%20-%20Snow/IMG00138-20100106-0807.jpg)
My lovely morning view....About 6 inches on the 'summer house'

(http://i776.photobucket.com/albums/yy50/Benninio/Jan%2009%20-%20Snow/IMG00140-20100106-0905.jpg)
After I'd cobbled together a golf club and a mop as am 'extendible satellite dish cleaning tool' and hung out the window I had to shake the snow off my phone line.....

(http://i776.photobucket.com/albums/yy50/Benninio/Jan%2009%20-%20Snow/IMG00142-20100106-1136.jpg)
Then thought I'd go for a spin...

I'm stuck here and losing my marbles.
Title: It snow joke
Post by: Zootoxin on January 06, 2010, 01:50:32 PM
I am at work like a hero :D
Title: It snow joke
Post by: DuVeL on January 06, 2010, 02:12:33 PM
Still @ work, guys, send some snow over please, we don't have a lot of that stuff atm here in the NL.
Email or by mail would be nice.
A story I got in my email;
 
December 8
6:00 PM. It started to snow. The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our cocktails and sat for hours by the window watching the huge soft flakes drift down from heaven. It looked like a Grandma Moses Print. So romantic we felt like newlyweds again. I love snow!
 
December 9
We woke to a beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering every inch of the landscape. What a fantastic sight! Can there be a more lovely place in the Whole World? Moving here was the best idea I've ever had. Shoveled for the first time in years and felt like a boy again. I did both our driveway and the sidewalks. This afternoon the snowplow came along and covered up the sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel again. What a perfect life.
 
December 12
The sun has melted all our lovely snow. Such a disappointment. My neighbor tells me not to worry, we'll definitely have a white Christmas. No snow on Christmas would be awful! Bob says we'll have so much snow by the end of winter, that I'll never want to see snow again. I don't think that's possible. Bob is such a nice man, I'm glad he's our neighbor.
 
December 14
Snow lovely snow! 8" last night. The temperature dropped to -20. The cold makes everything sparkle so. The wind took my breath away, but I warmed up by shoveling the driveway and sidewalks. This is the life!
The snowplow came back this afternoon and buried everything again. I didn't realize I would have to do quite this much shoveling, but I'll certainly get back in shape this way.
 
December 15
20 inches forecast. Sold my van and bought a 4x4 Blazer. Bought snow tires for the wife's car and 2 extra shovels. Stocked the freezer.
The wife wants a wood stove in case the electricity goes out. I think that's silly. We aren't in Alaska, after all.
 
December 16
Ice storm this morning. Fell on my butt on the ice in the driveway putting down salt. Hurt like heck. The wife laughed for one hour, which I think was very cruel.
 
December 17
Still way below freezing. Roads are too icy to go anywhere.
Electricity was off for 5 hours. I had to pile the blankets on to stay warm. Nothing to do but stare at the wife and try not to irritate her. Guess I should've bought a wood stove, but won't admit it to her. God I hate it when she's right. I can't believe I'm freezing to death in my own living room.
 
December 20
Electricity's back on, but had another 14" of the damn stuff last night. More shoveling. Took all day. Darn snowplow came by twice.
Tried to find a neighbor kid to shovel, but they said they're too busy playing hockey. I think they're lying. Called the only hardware store around to see about buying a snow blower and they're out. Might have another shipment in March. I think they're lying. Bob says I have to shovel or the city will have it done and bill me. I think he's lying.
 
December 22
Bob was right about a white Christmas because 13 more inches of the white crap fell today, and it's so cold it probably won't melt till August. Took me 45 minutes to get all dressed up to go out to shovel and then I had to poop. By the time I got undressed, pooped and dressed again, I was too tired to shovel. Tried to hire Bob who has a plow on his truck for the rest of the winter; but he says he's too busy. I think the jerk is lying.
 
December 23
Only 2" of snow today. And it warmed up to 0. The wife wanted me to decorate the front of the house this morning. What is she nuts!!! Why didn't she tell me to do that a month ago? She says she did but I think she's lying.
 
December 24
6". Snow packed so hard by snowplow, I broke the shovel. Thought I was having a heart attack. If I ever catch the man who drives that snowplow I'll drag him through the snow by his nose and beat him to death with my broken shovel. I know he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish shoveling and then he comes down the street at 100 miles an hour and throws snow all over where I've just been!
Tonight the wife wanted me to sing Christmas carols with her and open our presents, but I was too busy watching for the snowplow.
 
December 25
Merry -bleeping- Christmas! 20 more inches of the slop tonight. Snowed in. The idea of shoveling makes my blood boil. I hate the snow! Then the snowplow driver came by asking for a donation and I hit him over the head with my shovel. The wife says I have a bad attitude. I think she's a fricking idiot. If I have to watch "It's A Wonderful Life" one more time, I'm going to stuff her into the microwave.
 
December 26
Still snowed in. Why the heck did I ever move here? It was all HER idea. She's really getting on my nerves.
 
December 27
Temperature dropped to -30 and the pipes froze, plumber came after 14 hours of waiting for him, he only charged me $1400 to replace all my pipes.
 
December 28
Warmed up to above -20. Still snowed in. THE WITCH is driving me crazy!!!
 
December 29
10 more inches. Bob says I have to shovel the roof or it could cave in. That's the silliest thing I ever heard. How dumb does he think I am?
 
December 30
Roof caved in. I beat up the snow plow driver he is now suing me for a million dollars not only the beating I gave him but also for trying to shove the broken snow shovel up where the sun don't shine. The wife went home to her mother. 9" predicted.
 
December 31
I set fire to what's left of the house. No more shoveling.
January 8
Feel so good. I just love those little white pills they keep giving me. Why am I tied to the bed?
Title: It snow joke
Post by: DannagE on January 06, 2010, 02:12:55 PM
Just got in from work, winter tyres ftw! :D
Title: It snow joke
Post by: Jewelz^ on January 06, 2010, 02:20:44 PM
No snow here in south east kent. Jelous much, just got in from school! :ranting2:
Title: It snow joke
Post by: Gandalf on January 06, 2010, 02:29:39 PM
I'm at work too, went to Sainsbury's at lunchtime which is a short walk away. Grabbed a couple of snaps :D

(http://www.deadmen.co.uk/photopost/data/500/medium/IMAG0015.jpg)

(http://www.deadmen.co.uk/photopost/data/500/medium/IMAG0014.jpg)

(http://www.deadmen.co.uk/photopost/data/500/medium/IMAG0013.jpg)

(http://www.deadmen.co.uk/photopost/data/500/medium/IMAG0012.jpg)
Title: It snow joke
Post by: lionheart on January 06, 2010, 02:38:17 PM
Galantly went into work this morning (50 miles) then 2 inches appeared and Ive run home like a scared child.....
 
 
Is this the post of the beast ?
 
<---
Title: It snow joke
Post by: A Twig on January 06, 2010, 03:04:17 PM
I had the joy of sticking two fingers up to all the tossers on my road who slate my ownership of a 4x4 all year round, until suddenly when their crappy little Euroboxes get stuck, my Land Rover is the best thing since sliced bread. I'm now on campus revising GPS systems.

When I set off this morning, I have a convo with a girl on my street.
Girl: "Mr are you driving?"
Me: "Yes."
Girl:"You're mad!"
Me:"No I'm not. I have a Land Rover. It's designed for it. And what the hell do you know about driving, you're 13."
Girl:"But you'll spoil the snow..."
Me:"Yes, yes I will...."

Snow schmow...
Title: It snow joke
Post by: RizZy on January 06, 2010, 03:41:48 PM
Without a doubt the worse thing thats came from the snow is the crap I've had to listen to on the radio at work all day - usually we have smooth fm, which I thought was a terrible radio station - their idea of modern music is 80's stuff, well it doesn't get a brilliant signal & the snow finished it off, a retune later & we had Leicester Sound on & all that's been played all day is crappy chart RnB, or the same song all day - I can't really tell.
Title: It snow joke
Post by: T-Bag on January 06, 2010, 04:40:00 PM
Walked into uni, and had used a make-shift sledge (tea try) for a while in the park that I walk through to get there.
Got in for about 11ish, did a bit off work then pub lunch, then sat on facebook for 2 hours and went home.

If the uni had have been closed I don't think I'd have done much less work. Best job ever.
Title: It snow joke
Post by: Othbarty on January 06, 2010, 06:53:03 PM
We have about 50 centimeters of snow here, and ~1 meter where the snow plow thingy has cleared of the roads (which btw is near impossible to traverse these days, stupid bloody snow!)
Title: It snow joke
Post by: Snokio on January 06, 2010, 06:54:01 PM
Had some snow, but not enough to prevent me from going into work :ranting2:
 
kinda weird driving home though at 5pm, the roads were empty :blink:, probably cause their bosses let them go home early, it was icy though!
 
Maybe they should tax the small engine cars now for not polluting as much as the V6's and V8's, well you know, this global WARMING isn't working (Hot long summer and mild winter was predicted for 2009 was it not :rolleyes:), but you can be rest assured I have been driving me car hard to make up for the less adequate :flirty:
Title: It snow joke
Post by: target on January 06, 2010, 08:19:58 PM
Pah, you're all wusses!

I had to drive from Malvern (Worcestershire) to Bexhill (East Sussex) via Bristol today.

It was probably the quickest I've gotten from Bristol to home, and I never went above 70 once ;)
Title: It snow joke
Post by: Thulsa Doom on January 06, 2010, 10:24:17 PM
Reminds me of what it used to be like, and most people coped and the schools remained open.
We're too soft!
Title: It snow joke
Post by: Toxteth on January 08, 2010, 12:26:50 AM
Some to**er has used the bad weather as an excuse to hit and run!  (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/8446671.stm)
Title: It snow joke
Post by: Tutonic on January 08, 2010, 04:16:52 PM
I'm looking outside at 42 inches of Vermont snow.

You all lose :flirty:
Title: It snow joke
Post by: Luminance on January 09, 2010, 04:01:06 PM
Quote from: Toxteth;301048Some to**er has used the bad weather as an excuse to hit and run!  (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/8446671.stm)

They did that in Nijverdal too, couple years ago, only thing is, there isn't that much snow normally, so they build it around a concrete pole (the ones that "protect" the people on the sidewalks next to it.).

That showed him :P