Dead Men Walking

Forum Archive 2023 => Laugh? I nearly started. => dMw's Community Centre => Community Archive => Look What I Found on the Internet => Topic started by: TheDvEight on July 25, 2011, 12:13:52 AM

Title: Ebay User Sells Watch Bought From Ex
Post by: TheDvEight on July 25, 2011, 12:13:52 AM
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=330591109342


Read the description LOL
Title: Ebay User Sells Watch Bought From Ex
Post by: sulky_uk on July 25, 2011, 09:41:58 AM
lol epic
Title: Ebay User Sells Watch Bought From Ex
Post by: Gh0st Face Killah on July 26, 2011, 11:25:38 PM
this listing (330591109342) has been removed, or this item is not available.
Title: Ebay User Sells Watch Bought From Ex
Post by: TheDvEight on July 27, 2011, 12:18:51 AM
yeah was only available for a few days the seller basically wrote how he was selling a watch his ex girlfriend gave him when they were together who then slept with the guys boss but i dont do it justice was rather funny
Title: Ebay User Sells Watch Bought From Ex
Post by: ArithonUK on July 27, 2011, 03:31:11 PM
(http://www.reversestreetads.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/funny-ebay-ad-300x197.png)

QuoteIf you want to look like an offensively rich footballer at fraction  of the cost take a look at this bad boy. This rather delicious watch for  the sportier men among you was given to me by my idiot of an ex  girlfriend, who by the way ended up in bed last Thursday with Steve.  Steve, for your information, is not me.
 The watch has a trustworthy and comforting rubber strap, in white,  which is more than you can say for my girlfriend who can’t be trusted  for five seconds and is about as comforting as having a lung removed.   The face is clear and consistent white with simple minimalist design  however my girlfriends face is covered in freckles, fake tan and has an  unsightly mole just under her right eye.
 This item is presented in a red gift box and is powered by a Storm  battery but I no longer have the box or the instructions, still could be  worse, my girlfriend unfortunately no longer has anywhere to live.
 Unfortunately I have only worn this watch twice since she purchased  it for me â€" Oh how extravagant of her -”Oh what gift can I buy my  boyfriend, I know. I’ll go to Covent Garden to the Storm shop and buy  him a watch but come home with 12 pairs of shoes for myself and a 3  Grand Breitling for Steve” By the way she also has big feet. Size 9. On a  woman, yes that’s what I said she should be in the circus. “Roll up  Roll up for the incredible big footed lady with a hairy eye wart”
 I was going to ask Steve if after eating my girlfriend’s body in  front of me, he might want to purchase the watch. I also then offered  him my girlfriends thrush pessaries from the bathroom cabinet.  He  declined both politely and drove off in his Grey 2002 plate Ford Focus â€"  LX. Grey like his personality, complexion and most of his hair.
 So as Mr Grey and Sasquatch Mole Eye wander off happily holding  hands, I will be withholding all the items remotely connected to our  relationship in escrow and sending them romantically on their way to  eBay.
 PS â€" As Steve is actually my boss and I punched him hard in the face  and subsequently do not have a job, the revenue from the sale of these  items will go toward feeding myself and my poor cat Judy, who sadly lost  her tail and one of her legs in a lathe accident.