213 thing not allowed in the US army (http://www.avalanchetankers.us/archives/000058.html)
This one is good: Never confuse a Dutch soldier for a French one.
And 4 Benny: Camouflage body paint is not a uniform.
Aswell 4 Benny: I may not line my helmet with tin foil to ‘Block out the space mind control lasers'.
And for the StarWars fans: The MP checkpoint is not an Imperial Stormtrooper roadblock, so I should not tell them "You don't need to see my identification, these are not the droids you are looking for."
Better ones for Benny are:-
Not allowed to wear a dress to any army functions
Inflatable sheep do *not* need to be displayed during a room inspection
113 There is absolutely no need to emulate the people from ‘Full Monty’ every time I hear the song "Hot Stuff".
No dancing in the turret. This especially applies in conjunction with rule #113.
Must not use government equipment to bootleg pornography.
Burn pits for classified material are not revel fires - therefore it is wrong to dance naked around them
May not wear gimp mask while on duty.
We do not 'charge into battle, naked, like the Celts'.
My chain of command is not interested in why I 'just happen' to have a kilt, an inflatable sheep, and a box of rubber bands in the back of my car.
And The best is
No, the pants are not optional
That guy is a star, he must have really wound up his officers!!