A man is lying in bed in hospital with an oxygen mask over his mouth. A young student nurse appears to sponge his hands and feet. "Nurse," he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?" Embarrassed, the young student replies, "I don't know, I'm only here to wash your hands and feet." He struggles again to ask, "nurse, are my testicles black?" Finally she pulls back the covers, raises his gown, holds his John Thomas in one hand and his testicles in her other hand, takes a closer look and says, "there is nothing wrong with them." Finally the mans pulls off his oxygen mask and replies, "that was very nice but, I asked are my test results back?"
A fireman charges into a kindergarten classroom holding up a screwdriver and shouts, "This is not a drill!!"
An Alsatian walks into to a telegram office, takes out a blank form and writes, "Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof." The clerk examines the paper and politely tells the dog, "there are only nine words here. You could send another 'Woof' for the same price." "But," the dog replies, "that would make no sense at all."
A turtle was walking down an alley when a gang of snails mugged him. A policeman came to investigate and asked the turtle if he could explain what happened. The turtle looked at the detective with a confused look on his face and replied "I don't know, it all happened so fast."
A woman goes to a psychiatrist and says, ''Doctor, you've got to do something about my husband -- he thinks he's a refrigerator!'' ''I wouldn't worry too much about it,'' the doctor replies. 'Lots of people have harmless delusions. It will pass.'' ''But you don't understand,'' the woman insists. ''He sleeps with his mouth open, and the little light keeps me awake.''
first and second are funny... other 3 are.... strange....
oh well... funny though
:lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao:
All of them are bloody funny! :lmfao: :lmfao: