want a job at McDonalds?

Started by Vincentvega, July 03, 2005, 05:16:43 PM

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Vincentvega

This is an actual job application a 17 year old boy submitted at a McDonald's fast-food establishment in Florida...and they hired him because he was so honest and funny!


NAME: Greg Bulmash

SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.

DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.

DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

EDUCATION: Yes.

LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

SALARY: Less than I'm worth.

MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.

REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.

HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.

PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.

MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?

DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?

DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do you have a car that runs?"

HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing house Sweepstakes.

DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job no, on my breaks yes.

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.

DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.

SIGN HERE: Aries

 
 :roflmao:
If fortune favours the brave....here\'s a quid

DarkAngel



Doris

Thats Hippys Apllication Form right?


vG.

Jamoe

that rings a bell, i think I've seen that befor.

still  :lmfao:  all the same :)

Dingo

QuoteOriginally posted by Jamoe@Jul 3 2005, 06:51 PM
that rings a bell, i think I've seen that befor.
[post=87673]Quoted post[/post]
[/b]

Jeez, can't even remember who you are applying to these days eh? :D
semper in merda solus profundum variare
http://www.geocities.com/arnoldsounds/whoami.wav

Jamoe

QuoteOriginally posted by Dingo@Jul 3 2005, 08:30 PM
Jeez, can't even remember who you are applying to these days eh? :D
[post=87678]Quoted post[/post]
[/b]
:lmfao:

Actualy I did once apply for a Job at McDonalds and even the Co-op.  Didn't get either  :huh:

thier loss   :D

TeaLeaf

QuoteOriginally posted by Jamoe@Jul 3 2005, 07:51 PM
that rings a bell, i think I've seen that befor.
That's because there are at least 520 links to it on Google.  :blink:

TL.
TL.
Wisdom doesn\'t necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself.  (Tom Wilson)
Talent wins games, but teamwork and intelligence wins championships. (Michael Jordan)

Phog

QuoteOriginally posted by TeaLeaf@Jul 4 2005, 12:19 PM
That's because there are at least 520 links to it on Google. :blink:

TL.
[post=87699]Quoted post[/post]
[/b]
Still good all the same :D

 :roflmao:
Phog

GhostMjr

lol! I remember that one ;). Unfortunately my mcDonald's application wasn't full of such aweinspiring humour but i am still there so I must be doing something right ;)

-=[dMw]=-GhostMjr

da_Ricci

Good 1  :roflmao:  :lmfao:
a Dutchy 2 shoot @.