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Messages - pornstar

#1
Look What I Found on the Internet / very funny site
August 17, 2007, 03:57:12 PM
it has just been recoded, give it a try

vote for your favourites, add jokes and recieve moderator status

all the latest gags are on here as well

link removed by BB

regards
#4
Laugh? I nearly started. / not a joke ,but!
May 31, 2007, 11:06:55 PM
This is strictly a mathematical viewpoint ... it goes like this:

What makes 100%?  What does it mean to give MORE than 100%?  Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%?  We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%?

So what makes up 100% in life, exactly?  Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

If:

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

is represented as:

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26

Then:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K

8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

and

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E

11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

but,

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E

1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

and

B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T

2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.

A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G

1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, we can now conclude this mathematical certainty that while Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, Attitude will get you there, it's the Bullshit and Ass kissing that will put you over the top
#5
Laugh? I nearly started. / the potato clock
May 28, 2007, 08:21:02 PM
this blonde goes into a jewellers, and asks the assistant " do you have a potato clock, the assistant says " you what, a potato clock, we have got carriage clocks , cuckoo clocks, grandfather clocks. ...whats a potato clock, are you sure thats what you meant?", and the blonde says " i  start my new job on monday  at nine in the morning, and my boyfriend said " you better get
up at eight o'clock"


LOL
#6
Laugh? I nearly started. / A Funny One
May 25, 2007, 03:07:58 PM
this scottish bloke goes on a skiing holiday to canada, anyway after a gruelling day on the slopes he retires to a public house at the bottom of the mountain, after a couple of  whiskeys he notices a stuffed animal on the wall with antlers, and asks the barman " whats that?", the canadian barman says " its a Moose", and the scottish chap replies " bloody hell, how big are the cats?"
#7
scientists have found that cows eat chocolate!!


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