what happens when wife drags her husband around Tesco.

Started by Jamoe, February 16, 2007, 01:18:30 PM

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Jamoe

QuoteProof of what can happen if a wife or girlfriend drags her husband or
boyfriend along shopping.   This letter was recently sent by Tesco's Head
Office to a customer in
Oxford:

Dear Mrs. Murray,

While wethank you for your valued custom and use of the Tesco Loyalty Card, the
Manager of our store in Banbury is considering banning you and your family
from shopping with us, unless your husband stops his antics.

Below is a list of offences over the past few months all verified by our
surveillance cameras:

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's
trolleys when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute
intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to feminine
products aisle.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone,
"Code 3" in housewares..... and watched what happened.

5. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

6. September 15: Set up a tent in the outdoor clothing department and told
shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring sausages and a Calor gas
stove.

7. September 23: When the Deputy Manager asked if she could help him, he
began to cry and asked, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

8. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror,
picked his nose, and ate it.

9. November 10: While appearing to be choosing kitchen knives in the
Housewares aisle asked an assistant if he knew where the antidepressants
were.

10. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the
"Mission Impossible" theme.

11. December 6: In the kitchenware aisle, practiced the "Madonna look"
using different size funnels.

12. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed, yelled
"PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

13. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, assumed
the fetal position and screamed "NO! NO! It's those voices again."

And; last, but not least:

14. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited a while;
then yelled, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here."

Yours sincerely,

Charles Brown
Store Manager

fake but :roflmao:

Nefertem

Rofl! :roflmao:

Some nice ideas.. Might use them at some point :g:
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Survivor of LAN V, VI, VIII, IX, X, XII, XIV, XVI, XVIII, XX, XXIV, XXX, XXXII, XXXIV and XXXVI so far...
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Bob

Quote4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone,
"Code 3" in housewares..... and watched what happened.
I want to try that :roflmao:
[imga=right]http://77.108.135.49/fahtags/ms10.jpg[/imga]* Threbrilith the Nightelf, born and raised by the Silver Oak Guardians *
Proud member of Dead Men Walking


Eternaluk

12. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed, yelled
"PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

It's great when you do that.

10. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the
"Mission Impossible" theme.

 and I've done that too...


 3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to feminine
products aisle.

I used ice-Cream. ><
Hokí - Dwarf Marksmanship Hunter.
Shather - Rogue Twink.

sheepy

[quote=smilodon;228785]
Sheepy appears and begins to stroke my head. According to his slurred drunken speech I am "lovely and like a fuzzy felt". Thankfully he soon leaves and passes out somewhere. [/quote]

Luminance

Quote from: Eternaluk;1776693. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to feminine
products aisle.

I used ice-Cream. ><

:lmfao: Genius,

although, you did spilled ice-cream! :sideways:

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Best knife, double kill:
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-=[dMw]=-Lumi|T.Wolve killed -=[dMw]=-R@ng3R with knife.