Christmas is coming.

[Doorman]

If you remember back in the mists of time, this thread started with a Christmas theme. To carry on in the same vein vane or vain take your kids to this cemetary.

[Doorman]

This post has been deleted.

[Doorman]

Ethel is a bit of a demon in her wheelchair, and loves to charge around the nursing home, taking corners on one wheel and getting up to maximum speed on the long corridors.

Because she and her fellow residents are one sandwich short of a picnic, they all tolerate each other, some of the males actually join in.

One day, Ethel was speeding up one corridor when a door opened and Mad Mike stepped out of his room with his arm outstretched.

"STOP!" he said in a firm voice. "Have you got a license for that thing?"

Ethel fished around in her handbag and pulled out a Kit Kat wrapper and held it up to him.

"OK" he said, and away Ethel sped down the hall. As she took the corner near the TV lounge on one wheel, Weird William popped out in front of her and shouted, "STOP!" Have you got proof of insurance?"

Ethel dug into her handbag, pulled out a beer mat and held it up to him. William nodded and said, "Carry on, ma'am".

As Ethel neared the final corridor before the front door, Bonkers
Brian stepped out in front of her, stark naked, holding a very sizeable erection in his hand.

"Oh, no!" said Ethel, "Not the breathalyzer again!"

[MAD_ness]

hope you'll keep posting your jokes m8
 :lol:  :lol:  :lol:

[Doorman]

You don't get rid of me that easy. I am STILL a member of this forum. Albeit not the 'members' bit.