Car for sale

[Gh0st Face Killah]

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=230451057921#description

Awesomely  funny advert!!!


Attention Teenage Drug Dealers/Low Life  & Oxygen Thieves
 
If you think you've saved enough benefit  from your 4 children before your 20, this could be the answer to your  prayers.
 
A proper *******ised, chaved up Skippy mobile if ever  there was. Enhance your street cred at the local drive thru burger joint  or council estate shop front no end with this utterly tacky converted  little Renault Clio. Not your Gran's idea of a lift to town, granted,  but a fantastic opportunity to increase 3 fold your class A drug selling  ability. This is the car you need boys. The punters will flock to the  window for your home grown skunk and other illegal substances. you just  ain't gonna look out of place in this little beauty! Now I've made sure  the tax ran out last November, so there is a big pat on your scrawny  little backs already.
 
Dig out yer favourite unwashed "Umbro"  hoodie and come cast your shifty little eyes on this. Ideal for the  "Street Pharmacist" and other suitably attired twats. Your gonna need a  baseball cap with this beauty, ideally one that comes with no fitting  instructions. Heaven forbid you should put it on the right way. What  better way to compliment your stolen Nike Air Max trainers than to be  seen dangling a foot outta this pocket rocket.
Worried about the  Babylon spotting ya, no need. Car comes fully equipped with proper  blacked out gangster glass on the side windows. Hell, you could even  fill the back up with yer ugly chav kids and knowone'd see 'em. doesn't  get much better boys. Ah, but it does. It does. To show your complete  and utter lack of taste and knowledge of the motor car you'll also find  the ridiculous rock hard lowered suspension to your taste as well. Why  not get a step closer to Gran's inheritance by offering her a lift in ya  new "wheels" then taking her down the post Office flat out over the  speed humps round your estate and hopefully knocking the spine out of  her? Might need 2 laps but god damn them single teenage mums smoking  Marlboro Lights outside the chippy will be impressed fella's. You know  that they like a ride like this. Turn up the Alpine Head Unit, stick in  your favourite and incomprehensible "Drum & Bass" Cd and the  throbbing out the 6x9 parcel shelf will have them pregnant in no time.
 
To complete the proper drug dealer look, a tasteless stripe has  been fitted from the front to the rear. Finished in "Air Max" white it  really doesn't complement the car in any shape or form. Rather like you  and your Brethren spitting on the floor constantly. Completely needless  but you think it makes a statement about you. You'll also enjoy the  totally pointless but ridiculously noisy after market air filter. About  as helpful as a fart in an astronaut suit, but hell, you didn't get  where you are today by being helpful, did you?
I'm quite sad to see  the thing go really. There is nothing more pleasurable to me at 41 than  to drive round in this bit of **** and look a complete prick. I'd much  rather hand the opportunity to you work shy crack head council tenants  any day. This little set of wheels is gonna let the other hoodies know  you've made it. cocaine and skunk selling is never gonna get any easier  for the lucky buyer of this car. I might have a deal on a couple of  gram's of smack or coke, but ideally I'd need to get a serious drug  habit before hand. Perhaps someone could help? You can pay in cash or  wraps, I'm easy really. Bring along your mums credit card or one that  your mate has cloned down the petrol station. If it is going to be hard  cash, please ensure it is discretely hidden in a used Tesco carrier bag,  and you have folded one Ã,£20 note around 4 others. Makes counting so  much easier.
 
For any female buyer I'm offering a free Tatoo of  something utterly meaninless to go in the middle of your lower back. If  you haven't already got your "Tramp Stamp" that is.
 
If your an  under-age drink driver, or under-age driver for that matter, this little  beauty really isn't going to attract the attention of the local  constabulary at all. you'll drift pass any patrol car effortlessly. Make  sure there is at least 6 of you in the car though, Splif in hand. If  your driving, have another swig from your 2 litre plastic "LIDL" brand  cider as you nonchalantly flip the bird to the passing police patrol.  Head off for the nearest estate for some tyre screeching fun. They ain't  never gonna take you alive in this.
 
The car does like a good  rev in the morning at any unsocial hour. Neighbours will love it and  feel proud to live in the same road. don't forget to rev the pants off  of it at all junctions and roundabouts as well. This really will  increase the length of your manhood no end. your virginity is gonna be a  thing of the past when the babes see you in this "fanny magnet". You  can almost bet your last eighth of puff your gonna get laid. Hell, might  even get a few STD's as well. your gonna get a proper bird with this  motor.
 
For the disqualified driver I'll even offer to recover it  from outside the local Magistrates or police station. What better way  to impress the local Judicial system in one final act of defiance before  collecting your ASBO?
 
Don't let the frivolous matter of  actually holding a current, valid drivers licence and insurance put you  off this bargain. A visit to your local crack house should procure some  documentation from as little as fifty quid.
 
Nuff said, innit.

[Gone_Away]

too bad it's been removed..

[Benny]

Cached.

http://209.85.229.132/search?q=cache:SPL7l2TTs7gJ:cgi.ebay.co.uk/2005-RENAULT-CLIO-DYNAMIQUE-16V-BLUE-/230451057921+http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll%3FViewItem%26item%3D230451057921%23description&cd=1&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=uk

[sulky_uk]

nice one benny:)