I may be single

[Benny]

I was pretty excited when my missus texted me claiming she "loved anal".
Dyslexic b****, turns out she loves Alan, my best mate.

[smite]

I have guy working for me called Alan Lovett..........Bet you cannot guess what he gets called

[Penfold]

I kid you not when I say my wife went to school with a girl named Nora Dick.

We also had some brothers at school with the surname Ness, the were Alistair and Peter.

At school we had this wonderfully impersonal way of only using your surname. The first letter of the christian name was used in cases where there was more than one boy names the same.  So in assemblies and bedtime roll calls it was always ....... A Ness  and P Ness.

Gospel.

[smilodon]

An old girlfriend of mine had a friend who's Aunt was called Francis Drapes. However she was always referred to as Aunt Fanny Drapes. Seems no one of her generation made the link. When my GF first heard this I though she was going to suffocate she was laughing so much. Smutty cow.

Then again this might be an Urban myth and I just remember remembering it....... or something?

[Blunt]

The 1st black woman PC in Bristol was called Adora Dick.
She had a brother Ivor.
Google will tell you it's true.
Also, i went to school with a girl called Verina, 1st thing she did when she was old enough was to change her name.
she's now called Fanny (ok I lied, I don't know what she changed it to)