Ghost Mjr

[Squonk]

Gj TL
:worship:
After reading his reply,it seems to me we may be better off banging our heads on a brick wall

[TeaLeaf]

Let's just say that at this point he has not done a Charlie application any favours.

TL.

[Gh0st Face Killah]

/me doffs hat towards TL.


Good Job, like the others his reply annoyed me more and I'm sorry to say his reply only goes to reinforce my belief that he should go.


Like Smite I'm standing by with a bat.  Now where did i put that hammer and nails.....

[JonnyAppleSeed]

Nice words TL

That would have taken me most of the night to slip a post like that together :thumbsup:

btw  ....Anyone else get the feeling Major's Dad wrote that  

[smilodon]

Poor sod. I'm sure he can put together a coherent post on his own when he wants to .

I think this sort of thing is going to become more common as the 'community grows' and we're going to be sending out more messages like this in the future.

On a more delecate note, and I may well get a verbal kicking for this, but I'm sure the chap doesn't do any of this to upset us. In fact I see nothing to suggest he has a nasty side about him at all. So I'm a little disappionted about the fairly vicious stuff appearing in this thread. We've met him at the LAN and as far as I'm concerned he was polite and pleasant chap. This is an Admin's forum and perhapse we should be a little more constructive about these issues. As the community grows we collectively take on a greater responsibilty as Admins. I'm sure TL had better things to do than write those two messages and his dialogue with Ghostmjr may still not yet be over.  We might take  aleaf out of his book when it comes to dealing with issues like this?

 :blink:  Now that sounded a whole lot more pompus than I planned but hopefully you'll get my point......no?

I'll get my coat

[OldBloke]

I wanted to say that. Thanks Smilo.

[Anonymous]

Yup, nicely put m8.

[Doorman]

Pompous git! Quite right though.

[smilodon]

To be honest I laughed at most of the suggestions about baseball bats, sympathise with everyones exasperation and can see the arguements for kicking him out.

The thought only struck me after I had re-read the whole thread a few times. So I certainly don't take the moral high ground and if there's any guilt to be had I'm in there with everyone else.

Still doesn't stop me being a pompous git though  :eyebrow:

[TeaLeaf]

I agree Smilo.  

If it helps anyone (and continuing the baseball bat analogy), I tend to construct posts like the  GhostMjr one on the basis that there is no point in using the post itself as a baseball bat.  

If you attack someone and leave them no room for manoeuvre then they will feel backed into a corner and come out swinging at you.  So you may as well tone it down, exclude anything that can be seen as overly personal, include a little bit of friendly humour/empathy or hope (to provide some light relief for them when reading it) and allow them some room to manouvre at their end when they read it.  If they feel they are not being pinned down and executed by the post then they are less likely to react in an aggressive fashion.  The nice thing is that by toning the post down and avoiding any too personal comments (trying to be generic) then usually the message still gets through, but the nasty reaction doesn't come back, which is why I suspect I have not yet had reply back from GhostMjr (and I know he has read my reply).  I reckon the message has hit home.  

My hope is that it helps him develop his interpersonal skills, the lack of which I believe is actually the bit that is ticking people off.  When you meet him in person he is very shy and timid.  Online he does not feel so inhibited or embarrassed as he does not have to look you in the eye at the same time, so online he tends to be a very enthusiastic young lad who sometimes forgets in his excitement how other people might react to some of the things he does.  Somewhat like I was when I was his age.   It took me a few encounters with posts like my above post to realise that my own enthusiasm crapped all over my ability to read other peoples feelings - he has the same problem and it will go away as he matures.  As Smilo said, there's nothing malicious about him which is why I tried to indicate early in the thread that kicking him out of Bravo was not really an option.

I just hope that he doesn't over-react to my PMs and pull out of Bravo - if he does it will only be because I didn't leave him enough room for manoeuvre -  I just hope I did leave him the room.........

TL.

[Doorman]

I luv sicolgy.  

[Anonymous]

You left him plenty room. If he does pull out it will be because he doesn't have the interpersonal skills to see what has been offered.

You did a fine job TL - don't blame yourself for someone elses lack of maturity (and I don't mean that in a nasty way about GhostMjr)

[TeaLeaf]

Looks like everything is fine and dandy.

TL.

Originally posted by Messenger Conversation

(ap)Capt.Scotty(ap)--=[dMw]=-GhostMjr(li)-i'm a prefect lol says:
hi paul r u busy?
Tealeaf says:
no, go ahead!
(ap)Capt.Scotty(ap)--=[dMw]=-GhostMjr(li)-i'm a prefect lol says:
gdgd
(ap)Capt.Scotty(ap)--=[dMw]=-GhostMjr(li)-i'm a prefect lol says:
i hope we r friends after the disagreement
(ap)Capt.Scotty(ap)--=[dMw]=-GhostMjr(li)-i'm a prefect lol says:
and i only post alot not to spam but to keep active as i really love the clan
Tealeaf says:
we hold no grudges and we don't class it as a disagreement
(ap)Capt.Scotty(ap)--=[dMw]=-GhostMjr(li)-i'm a prefect lol says:
ok cool
(ap)Capt.Scotty(ap)--=[dMw]=-GhostMjr(li)-i'm a prefect lol says:
but is it ok then if i post alot but only when relvent or shall i post only on topics i can trully give feedback
Tealeaf says:
we have no problem with posting replies, so long as the majority of them add value. But *eveyrone* posts some drivel now and then, me included
Tealeaf says:
and that's fine, as long as it doesn't become the majority
(ap)Capt.Scotty(ap)--=[dMw]=-GhostMjr(li)-i'm a prefect lol says:
ok fine so i will only post when it is not drivel eg cheers or thanks notes
Tealeaf says:
np
Tealeaf says:
catch you on the hook later - after the match
(ap)Capt.Scotty(ap)--=[dMw]=-GhostMjr(li)-i'm a prefect lol says:
o rite u guys got a match on
(ap)Capt.Scotty(ap)--=[dMw]=-GhostMjr(li)-i'm a prefect lol says:
gd l
Tealeaf says:
Nope but England have
(ap)Capt.Scotty(ap)--=[dMw]=-GhostMjr(li)-i'm a prefect lol says:
o football
(ap)Capt.Scotty(ap)--=[dMw]=-GhostMjr(li)-i'm a prefect lol says:
sorry i thought the guys were playing a match lol
Tealeaf says:
no way!
(ap)Capt.Scotty(ap)--=[dMw]=-GhostMjr(li)-i'm a prefect lol says:
lol we all like a beer with football aye!
Tealeaf says:
catch ya l8r
(ap)Capt.Scotty(ap)--=[dMw]=-GhostMjr(li)-i'm a prefect lol says:
ok cya paul

[Dr Sadako]

Group hug!  

[Gh0st Face Killah]

Ahhhh.......


But seriously Good Job Tl with that. Having reread the thread I may have been a bit hasty with some of my comments but he was starting to get on my nerves and I haven't quite got the saintly patience that you appear to have.